Parenting Tip — Honor

One of the roadblocks to sibling harmony is selfishness. Children want to be first or best. Teaching kids to serve others is an important way for them to learn honor. A servant gives more than half, considers others’ needs, and looks for ways to benefit those around him. Children who learn to be servants make better employees, develop meaningful friendships, and enjoy relationships more.

One fun way to teach children to be servants is the “I Cut, You Pick” Rule. It helps children who both want the last piece of cake, or plan to split a chocolate bar. It simply goes like this. When children must divide something between the two of them, ask one child if he would rather cut or pick. The other alternative goes to the second child. This plan motivates the person cutting to be as equal as possible.

Now, instead of two children arguing about who got the biggest piece, they are both involved in the solution. The “I Cut, You Pick” rule equips children with a tool they can use in many situations to bring peace instead of frustration in relationships.

The technique actually comes from a Bible story of Abraham and Lot. They had too many herds and not enough food so they decided to divide the land between the two huge families. Abraham, being a wise servant of God, said, “I’ll cut the land into two pieces and you pick which one you’d like.” In the story, Lot chose what appeared to be the better piece but Abraham was rewarded in the end and, most importantly, their relationship was preserved.

This tip comes from the book Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes in You and Your Kids by Dr Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN

Adding honor as a factor in raising kids …and parent-child relationships.

Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller of the National Center for Biblical Parenting offer a thorough program for establishing honor as a basis of family life — not just children honoring parents, but parents respecting children and children honoring each other. Even if honor seems a long way off in your household, you will find practical suggestions here to bring that goal a little closer — suggestions for kids of all ages. Honor is the biblical value that will bring about good behavior. It’s more than just changing what kids do; it’s changing the deeper issues of the heart that triggered the behavior.


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